What the crack?

CNN REPORT: Binge drinking becoming an epidemic on college campuses.

Personally I always felt like the epidemic on college campuses was watching woman freshman come in nice and skinny and seeing them in their junior year with what appeared to be cottage cheese on their thighs. Only later did I learn what that was all about. Yes, you know it too - they couldn't find a good man, so they chose to fill their oral cavities with ben and jerry's and pizza, beer, candy, etc. Wait a second, that's what I was doing too. (CLARIFICATION: For lack of a good woman that would put up with all my crap). Holy Jesus, I just can't win can I. These circular arguments can really drive one to drink.

Heard this on CNN today as I was running on the treadmill. I know I should be running outside, especially on such a gorgeous day, but alas, I opted for the mindless run while watching TV. It is still good for the cardiovascular system, right?

I remember back in my day, I was going to school 2 hours north of another college campus where I had a friend living. One afternoon, I learned a friend of mine was going to be driving down to visit his girlfriend for the evening at this campus. I hitched a ride so i could party with my buddy.

Arriving in his dorm room, we proceeded to take 2 oz straight shots of Vodka with a water chaser. (Overheard: Is there any food around? Answer, No. Is there any fruit juice or something? No!) Needless to say, a couple hours later I was completely shitfaced. I sort of passed out on the dorm room floor only to wake up and stumble to the hallway shared restrooms. I forgot to kneel beside the toilet so I puked all over the bathroom stall. Of course, being too drunk to clean it up, I just mosied back to the room where I was staying. When I returned to the room, my friend had made a cardboard puke box for me. Throughout the rest of the night, I puked and puked, scaring the shit out of his very Christian and religious (and eternally sober) roommate.

It was only later I learned that the entire floor of the dormitory had been asked to pay the cleaning fee for the mess I made. In fact, it was only later that I was told about most of this story.

So yes, binge drinking is a problem, but I ask - how else are you going to find your true limits? In fact, doesn't this analogy apply for most things...? How do you really push yourself in life - Answer: By trial and error. I learned my lessons the hard way and only two other times during my college career did I get so fucked up.

The last one, also in the dorms, I remember had to do with 151 and crawling with all my might toward the bathroom to puke, only waking up in the hallway at the foot of the bathroom door sometime in the middle of the night. That too was a pretty weird experience. By the time I was a sophomore, I learned to drink a little slower.